By Sara Regan

Sweet mama, sometimes a birth does not go the way we had planned or envisioned. Maybe it begins positive but does not end that way, or opposite of that begins negative and ends positively. No matter the situation, we all need and deserve the time to heal and process. No matter how you brought your baby here, you are a goddess; a hero. 

Here is my story:


Born at home on an icy night our sweet baby boy decided he was coming fast and furious…

Please welcome our newest family addition

Zayden Reed Regan

7lbs 1oz and 19” long


Zayden came into this world unexpectedly and VERY quickly! Contractions began at 1120pm and he arrived with less than 2 minutes of pushing at 1246am on November 21, 2019. It was snowy and icy and living in the mountains no way I’d make it to the hospital…so preparation began – as in finding every blanket, pillow, towel etc that could be found and putting in on the bed around me.

The other two kids lie sleeping peacefully down the hall less than 20 feet away….and never once woke up. Tears streamed down my face – a combination of pain and pure fear of what was going to happen.

Thinking back for the first time now and recalling everything I went through makes me cry. I not only did a natural birth for the first time, but I delivered my beautiful baby boy at home on our bed! I had the help and support of my wonderful mom to witness it with me, my amazing neighbor Courtney who coached me through it all, and of course Jesse who made me believe I could do it even when I didn’t. All the first responders who showed were great and so caring! 

The pain was so intense I didn’t think I could do it. The blood… so much blood everywhere. Trying to find a position that worked, on my knees seemed best with my head resting on a pillow. My mom held my hands and relaxed my fingers, Courtney guiding my breathing and massaging my back. The nausea was severe, the sweating I didn’t know I was doing until the end…then the pushing. I felt him coming down the birth canal, a feeling I could never describe – every part of his small body – and with a few urges he arrived. We heard the words “ITS A BOY” as he began to cry, and all at once I crumbled over my weak body into my mom and Courtney’s arms. I had done it. HE was here safe and healthy and beautiful. NEVER in my life would I have expected things to go as they did, but wow what a story and experience.

What teamwork, effort and support. His cord was VERY short – about a foot – so we waited without movement as they wrapped him to keep him warm and let the pulsating stop and my mom got to cut the cord. With lots of help they moved me to the head of the bed and I got to hold him for the first time, where all at once things started to hit me. I had just had a baby, in my house, on my bed, with no medication, with 12 people watching and helping, my kids down the hall, a massacre seen present…and I was okay. For a moment I sat in awe of the situation, of myself and that I truly had done it, of my beautiful little boy I was now holding. 

Next was the placenta. I didn’t realize I had a round 2. After many position changes standing was best and after finally passing the placenta (more pain I didn’t expect and longer than usual apparently) they prepared us for our ambulance ride to the hospital. With chains on the vehicles, they loaded us onto a stretcher. My body covered in blood and such and blankets and towels to keep me warm. They then placed him on my chest to head into the cold night. The drive there, just him and I (Jesse followed and Mom and Courtney stayed with the kid’s and to clean the massacre looking soon) I was still in a complete daze of what I had just done and what had happened. He nursed for the first and we snuggled and rested our hard worked bodies together.

We arrived at the hospital around 330am and were welcomed in awe with our story by everyone. Our entire stay there I was asked by every new person to share…so special and such a blessing to share. We got to come home last evening after some slight setbacks. I lost a lot of blood fast and still await the possibility of a transfusion pending the next few days. He swallowed a lot of fluids coming out so quickly so was slow to nurse causing his jaundice to worsen. Currently it’s okay but we will recheck Monday and prayers we both get to stay home. One of the paramedics helping with his birth was able to come and check his SPO2 and he passed with flying colors which made me cry! NO OXYGEN!!!

My husband said last night as we got ready for bed “welcome home baby boy” but we both laughed because he was home before, he was just coming back.

Birth is unique for each of us and even for each of our children. This birth was nothing like I imagined or anticipated. I had epidurals with my first two children and definitely didn’t consider a home birth! But God had other plans. This sweet baby holds a special place in my heart now and forever because of OUR birth story. And now, 4 months later, I am still not done processing that night. 

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